Lately (and of course, I blame the hormones) I feel very lonely.
How can I be lonely when I am with someone ALL THE TIME… and by that I don’t even mean my life partner, I mean the little Dragon growing inside me (about the whole dragon thing, later).
But I am that, lonely. Probably has to do with all the changes.
I am boring to my single friends.. or rather, I’d rather not go to dance parties or drunken bacchanals… for some odd reason (not that I did much of that in singlehood). I am boring to my married or coupled friends. I am big and hormonal and can’t really walk as fast as I used to, or be on my feet for too long (or simply, they don’t think inviting a pregger lady to certain events is cool… taking the decision out of my hands). My friends with kids… well, I’m still boring to them. My child is on the inside, theirs is on the outside and there is no interaction possible. Yet.
So I’m lonely.
I know, all life changes come with a turnaround of those special people that accompany you through them. When you have as many life changes as I have had in the last year and a half, there hasn’t been enough time for adjustment. Friendships, somehow, have been run over by metamorphosis. Barely getting on with friends with partners when in dire need of pregnant friends and soon enough mommy friends. Ok, I need friends.
(have also learnt that many friendships, if it is not me instigating the communion, it just won’t happen… and well, it can’t always be me, can it?)